Mar 30 2009
ShamWow Guy destroys tongue-biting hooker
It’s 4am and there’s nothing good on TV. Oh wait, it’s a ShamWow commercial! Yessssss!
Man, I love ShamWows. If you don’t know what they are, then I feel sorry for you. I’ll bet you still use paper towels and napkins to clean up spills.
A ShamWow is basically a cross between a magical absorbant sponge and a towel. They last for years, and you can wash them with your normal laundry. I usually wash mine separately though because I clean up a lot of blood with my ShamWows.
Those of you already familiar with the product most likely know Vince Shlomi, the “ShamWow Guy.” This charming man is also the pitchman for the “Slap Chop” - a food-chopping device.
Last week, thesmokinggun.com reported that Vince Shlomi was arrested for Chris-Browning a prostitute in his hotel room in South Beach, Florida.
On February 7th, Vince met Sasha Harris, 26, at a nightclub in Miami. After some drinks, they went back to Vince’s hotel room, where Sasha offered to have sex with him for $1000.
Vince should have waited until after the sex to pay her.
Things got weird when Vince, 44, tried to kiss Sasha and she bit his tongue, but not in a playful way. When she wouldn’t let go of his tongue, Vince unleashed a fury of blows so brutal that Ike Turner actually cheered from his grave.
A bloody mess, Sasha ran out of the hotel room and notified the security guard, who called the police. Both Vince and Sasha were arrested for felony aggravated battery, and then taken to the hospital for treatment.
Vince did sustain some minor injuries to his mouth, but it is clear from the mugshots who lost the fight.
According to Vince, he only continued to punch Sasha until she let go of his tongue. However, judging from her injuries, it looks like Vince started from the back of the room with a flying fist aimed directly for her eye.
Out of everything, I am most surprised by the fact that police didn’t find any cocaine in Vince’s hotel room. I was positive.
I agree with Skribbles, that Chris-Browning quip was hilarious. Way to coin a new term. Just excellent.
I can say is sham……WOW
LOL
too fucking hilarious!!!
I bet you he shouted SHAMWOW after every hit.
Haha, Florida.
He should’ve choked her out with a shamwow… those things are great for everything. They totally don’t leave choke marks.
Thanks for my daily dose - awesome!
Dude, I knew something was wrong with that guy.
PS - If you watch the ShamWOW commercial REALLY closely, you’ll see that ShamWOWs aren’t as fabulous as he makes them out to be. Hint: Watch carefully when he pours soda on the piece of carpet.
Under his mugshot the caption should say ” You getting dis Camera Guy”???